Must suck being a virus. Imagine it. One day you are just floating around in the breeze, having a great time, just chilling. The next day you get sucked into someone’s mouth and thrown onto their tonsils. Hanging on for dear life you bury yourself into those fleshy little red things and settle in for a while. Suddenly you realize, hey this isn’t so bad. It is nice, warm, food is always passing by. You get to taste a little bit of what your friend is eating. Well, everyone time your host breathes you feel like you are being ripped apart from your house like in a tornado, but whatever. You know that in 5 days time you will have totally latched on and will get a nice few days of rest.

5 days later and it is like a mini vacation for a week. You get a nice hot bath of liquids coming from your host’s copious consumption of tea. Your “hotel room” last week was a nasty motel on the side of the road, but now your room has been upgraded to the penthouse – so much more space! Those tonsils have really expanded for you, how nice.

At some point though you realize that this person’s mouth isn’t the greatest and it is time to move on. So you pack your bags, drink everything you can at the minibar, and don’t pay the bill. You skip town on the next cough and go back to floating in the breeze.

Life is so rough for a virus.


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