I am pretty sure I am getting a steal on this deal I set up. I gave the kid in my compound a pez dispenser that I got for free in exchange for killing any and all spiders I find. I just have to scream and yell “ANASI” and he is required to come. And does.
So there is this super annoying spider that has been tormenting me for weeks. He knows how much I hate him, yet he sticks around. How on earth do these little monsters find enough food to survive in my house? Somehow and somewhere they are getting some good eatings. I have a fear of spiders. It has gotten much better since I have been here, in America any spider freaked me out. Here it is just the flat ones and semi-flat giant ones that send me packing. They are incredibly fast and incredibly creepy. They have these huge pinchers that they use to intimidate me. They like to torture me and see how long I can go without hyperventilating. Apparently so does the mom in my compound.
So, I’m pulling back a bag I have hanging off the wall. Why? I don’t know. I had an inkling he was hiding and I wanted him out. Well, I have spiderradar, because he was there. And snuck out on me. I screamed and ran for the door. I felt bad because I screamed pretty loud. I yelled: “ENOCH!!!!!” The name of the boy in my compound who is tasked with killing my spiders. The entire compound comes running and is laughing so hard. They know it is an anasi. No one runs out of there house faster and does a stupid dance just because, obviously there is a nasty spider involved. Otherwise I wouldn’t run out of the house and dance and freak out. I go back in to show them where and the mom grabs me and makes me stay, hence the hyperventilating. Don’t worry I’m squirrely and I got away.
So they grab my half broom and start looking for him. They take down all my dresses hanging on the wall and he has disappeared. So I come back in the house and see a shadow move. Thanks spiderradar! There he is, the little demon trying to disappear behind my bookcase. I DON’T THINK SO. Prepare to face your destiny. So I scream a little more, point, and run out of the house. 30 seconds later and after some funky noises, the mom is sweeping something out of my house. “Oh, Jackie, it is just a small one…” Haha. Right. And Oklahoma is swing-state.
We put my house back together and all celebrate the death of the evil evil spider. And such is life in the Wenchi Wench Compound. We kill. We maim. And we celebrate.
On a related note, I had a mild heart attack today when I walked in to my kitchen around 3pm. One of the boys in the compound was in my kitchen looking through my fridge. The door was closed. I know he wouldn’t take anything, although he uses my girly body wash…He closed the fridge door quickly and said he saw a spider come into the kitchen. So he went around the kitchen and killed everything in site. I mean, I guess that’s a good excuse. Plus, I got all the spiders out of my kitchen. Next time, he can just ask for some cold water.
So moral of the story: One Pez Dispenser with Candies is Equivalent to Two Years of Spider Eradication.